Tuesday, August 31, 2004

I'm staring blankly at my wall, half expecting a milk-white unicorn to gracefully come trotting. The cracked paint ripples slightly and you could almost hear the faint sound of thumping hoofs. And as I lie back on my bed, eyes slighly closed, Everly trots up quietly. With graceful gentleness, he lays his head on my lap. As Everly folds his wings, I caught a whiff of green apples. It could only mean...

And with nary a movement, Everly looks up at me with expectant brown eyes, beckoning me towards the wall.

'Sigh no... not today, Everly. I'm not interested to see the mischief you've been up to. Stop twitching you ears! I'm not following you... I've got important things to do here...'

Everly threw back his head and neighed indignantly. His ears now twitching faster like clockwork. 'Come on... I've got things to show you... you'll be thrilled!'

'No.. I..I... can't...'

'Come on now.. since when you're so hesitant? It'll be fun! I'll fly carefully this time, promise'

...

'Come on... I've really got something to show you!'

Everly was strangely very persistent... and patient with me. Sigh, I just hope it's not what I think it is. Well, there's only one way to find out.

As I sat on Everly's back, he trots into the wall, then galloping, he spreads his wings and soars into the air.

Everly is taking me to Boredom, my newly enthroned kingdom. A place for wishful thinking. It lies to the north of Eskimo-nia, the land of the mechanical polar bears...

to be continued...

3:12 PM 0 comments hmm?

Monday, August 30, 2004

Flakey Hobbes wacky files #125

Did it ever crossed your mind that you could actually tell a person's character by observing how they eat a sunny-side up chicken egg? hmmm...

Sunny-side up or bull's eye, whatever you call it, is one of the best ways to prepare a chicken egg. (doesn't taste good with duck eggs) Prepared on a non-stick pan (with little or without oil) for the health conscious or submerged in hot oil... yum yum. Served with bacon for breakfast, nasi lemak with chicken rendang, steaming yee mee soup, hot plate noodles... nuts, i'm salivating! The egg yolk must not be overcooked, but just cooked. It should wobble when slightly shaken without spilling over the whites. Ahh... the scrumplicious sunny-side up egg!

The crammer
The crammer aka The gulper eats the egg in one big mouthful. It must be conquered in one mouthful, come what may. And it doesn't matter if the yellow drips down your chin. Your goal is to finish it up in one go. You're hardly bothered even when people gasp at you in horror at your etiquette-less egg eating style.

If this is you, you're a show off. Your main motto in life is to be loud, braggy and crass. You want your presence to be felt by all anytime, anywhere. It doesn't matter if others think the worse of you. You eat, sleep, breathe and self bask comfortably in yourself.

Sun devourer
You arm yourself with a rounded spoon. You study the egg from all angles, deciding the best entry point to scoop the yolk sans any messiness. After much careful calculation and deliberation, you are ready for your task. Of course, the scoop was perfect since you spent 20minutes doing mental calculations. Sometimes you're even tempted to use a gravy dipped toothpick and do the maths on your table napkin. That's not to say you can't do mental calculations, but you enjoy smirking at the waiter's dumbfounded face when he clears your table.

If this is you, you're meticulous. Your world revolves around fractions and nano details. This is usually genetically inherited from the maternal side. Paternally if your dad is brainier than your mom. Everything must be broken down into unbreakable data portions and analysed infinitely. Nothing is ever too tedious or impossible to be reflected in numbers.

Cloud eater
You gingerly slice the whites at least 2mm from the yolk with your dinner knife. (spoon works just fine too) You're doing fine till the last bit and you start to fidget. You cut the whites more than you intent to and the yolk spills out. You're hardly bothered with the messy egg. You eat up what's left on your plate because you believe you should end something although not perfectly as you intended. It just became too arduous to finish it properly.

This makes you the good starter, sloppy ender. You attempt every new project with a gusto only to become lazy and falter towards the ending. Your motto in life, 'Ah well, at least I started... *yaaawwwnnnnn*'.

Recognise yourself in any of these three? And whoever says that chicken eggs are only related to chickens?

2:30 PM 1 comments hmm?

Thursday, August 26, 2004

I never dreamt that Ken will one day have to face-off with other guys for Barbie's affection. What else more can Barbie (or any girl for that matter) want from a perfect guy who worships the very air she exhales? If you have no inkling of an idea what i'm ranting about, Barbie just ditched Ken for a beefed-up klutz aka Blaine. Who wouldn't want a younger, beefier guy in their life? I would. But isn't love suppose to triumph over all else? Wrinkles and all? And what sort of image are we portraying to kids? Sigh, read on.

'til death do us part or when you have a beer gut
Toys are just no longer the same as it used to be 15 years ago. Back then, toys were just that, toys. Now it's mtv influenced ala the fast and the furious lifestyle. I pity Barbie. If she had a voice, I doubt this is what she truly wants. I feel it's such a pathetic marketing ploy just to keep Barbie in the business. (okay, disclaimer here, I'm merely giving my opinion based on my limited knowledge on this) Okay, let's venture into the issue of love. When you swore to love each other 'til death do us part, I believe it wasn't done for the sake of it. At least... during that moment of fluttering hearts and dizzy happiness. Perhaps for once, we should really mean what we say. Or just don't say it at all.

Commitment phobia
Okay to be fair, what about the what-ifs? What if this was Barbie's idea all along? What if she's afraid of commitment and settling down? A younger bloke would seem to solve the problem, superficially though. You don't need to settle down when you have the world at your feet. It's an option. Being young and carefree (or even for the young at heart) gives you that freedom. But who says you can't have fun while staying commited to each other? You'll just be experiencing a different sense of fun. One that has the word responsible preceding it.

Invasion of childhood innocence
So Barbie and Ken might not be the ultimate role model of a perfect family. But kids grew up with them. Glitzier clothes and cooler gadgets aside, both B&K did stood by each other. I'd say keep the drama confined to mind numbing soaps and protect the innocence of childhood. Sure you may inject some bickering into the B&K story to spice things up. By all means, have cat fights and tantrum throwing as well. It's part of a healthy relationship approach of 'we-talk-things-out', no? But take a moment and ponder upon this: Is it really necessary?

Blimey, it's reality, loosen up!
Yup, it's the age of tell-it-all. Aren't we suppose to expose our kids to the realities of life instead of cocooning them up? And tell it to them via their play things. It's something they can relate to without having to scratch their heads sore. But if we're going to run our awareness campaign through such channels, I guess it's just so inappropriate. And debilitating.

We as consumers determine the marketability of toys. We can decide what sells and what doesn't. At the end of the day, it's not about Barbiedom drama, but about teaching our kids wholesome values.

I hope Barbie changes her mind. For good.

p.s. I think I took the issue out of context. Sigh, I guess it's because I missed my childhood. Back then, the only worry I had was whether mom would buy me that faux fur coat for Barbie. And matching winter boots.

5:00 PM 1 comments hmm?

Flakey Hobbes Wacky Files, # 248

At some point of our lives, we'd have an imaginary friend. Ain't it cute to see your younger sibling or your child holding their imaginary friend's hand and talking to him/her? Sure is! According to Disney Encyclopedia imaginary friends is part of growing up.But what happens if this habit continues into adulthood? Freaky, I'd say. You need help for sure!

Hear my wacky views on imaginary friends in adulthood...

The escapist
The world is a huge wolf, always on the prowl to gobble you up. The pressures of daily life is enough to cause you temporary loss of sanity. 'Woe is me, woe is me!' is all you could utter. Worse, no one seems to understand the predicament you're going through. 'Oh, if only Marty was here! He'll understand'. And so begins your reconciliation with your long lost buddy... only he doesn't exist! You begin to eat, sleep and talk to him, abandoning everyone and everything else. Slowly, your mind is sucked out from this world. What happens next, I leave it to your imagination!

The perfectionist
Your idea of perfectionism is having matching (and clean) floormats outside every bathroom door in your house. You freak out if one of the mats is slightly faded. Extreme perfectionist, need I elaborate further? A day won't pass by without you nitpicking on others. No one (and seriously no one) measures up to your meticulous ways. Who else will tolerate you but your friend, Perfect Peter?

The bored and lonely
'No one understands me!' you scream silently every single morning you wake up. (if you do wake up, that is) You need personal space but yet lament when everyone gives you the space. You desperately seek companionship, but become edgy when approached. How you wish you can have friends that will come and go as you please. *a bulb lights up!* And so begins your on-off friendship with Matt, Kel, Sue, Rick, etc.

The illusionist
The illusionist is somewhat like the escapist, with a touch of magic. (ok, kidding) The escapist is unable to face life pressures but the illusionist conjures up imaginary friends for the fun of it. While the escapist is looking for solace and comfort in their 'friend', the illusionist imagines elaborate identities for each of their friend(s). They have names, their own lives and gasp! may interact with one another. This self absorbed world is so intricate, it's like watching a prime time Latino soap opera.

Sometimes, it's difficult to recognise these symptoms yourself. Most of the time, your friends or family would be the one to notice the erratic behavioral patterns. It's a touchy issue and will need a tactful approach. Whatever you do, remember to seek help.
Do unto others as how you'd want others to do unto you.

"The imaginary friends I had as a kid dropped me because their friends thought I didn't exist". -- Henry Miller

12:11 PM 0 comments hmm?

Tuesday, August 24, 2004

Uh-oh daddy!
Sobbed little Katie
I broke your 29-inch tv.

Don't worry lil Katie
Said kind daddy
You're still my lil sweetie.

Cheer up lil Katie
Let's go play at PeeWeeWee
Shh... don't wake tired mommy!

I'll put you on the swing
and swing you real high
till your feet touch the sky!

And so lil Katie
was all pink and giggly
smiling ever so cheekily!

4:12 PM 1 comments hmm?

Monday, August 23, 2004

If love is like a flower,
innocence would be its scent.
So fragile and untainted,
like a baby's first breath.

But real love is like a weed,
nourished from a single seed.
Though blemished with imperfections,
stands weathered throughout seasons.

Man, so corny... but ain't it a bit true? I think I'd rather embrace something ungraceful or unattractive to see the beauty within.

"The love in your heart was not put there to stay. Love is not love 'til you give it away". -- Oscar Hammerstein II

1:35 PM 0 comments hmm?

Saturday, August 21, 2004

... if you stumbled upon my page, know that it wasn't mere coincidence! it was either:

a) we were destined to meet.
b) you were recommended by a friend/acquaintance.
c) you had nothing better else to do.
or...
d) uhm well, you had nothing better else to do!

and that's the first trivial fact of the day!!

11:30 AM 2 comments hmm?