Thursday, March 24, 2005

Flakey Hobbes return with some trivial facts on, How to murder a mosquito in 5 ways - from least to most brutal in order.

Spray - is what most people did when Baygon and Ridsect were popular back in the 90s. And the good thing is, you get to murder a whole host of other 6-legged critters at the same time. Quite efficient too - you spray, mozzies inhale, mozzies get dizzy, and mozzies go kaput with wings and legs still intact. Clean job, eh...

Zap - is when you kill the mosquitos with the zapper aka badminton racket. A genius rip off design of the electric chair that works on 2 AA batteries. It emits tiny amounts of electricity enough to bring down a cow (ok, kidding). So, you prey on unsuspecting mozzies, press the button, zap mozzie with zapper, get ready for some fireworks display, hold button down until you see whiffs of smoke and ta daa! barbecued mozzies. Then feed it to the dustbin. (:

Crush - is when the mosquito is crushed between two surfaces e.g., palm-to-palm, palm-to-wall, foot-to-floor etc. Eye mozzie carefully and with a quick kung fu move, crush the mozzie in any of the methods mentioned above. If the mozzie has just had it's fill of blood, don't forget to be artistic as well. Try crushing the mozzies with different pressures and see the blood splatter into a work of art. heehee...

Whack - is when you whack the mozzie which is flying in the air with your palm. This sudden move will leave the unsuspecting mozzie dazed but still alive. If you whack it hard enough, mozzie will spiral down to the floor and blood will start to trickle out slowly. You can choose to stomp it to end its misery or let it fly away. Brutal eh? Wait till you read about the last method...

Explode - is the most brutal way to murder a mosquito. You allow target to sip blood from you while you watch. And when the blood transfusion is almost done, you squeeze the particular area with enough pressure so that the blood will shoot up and into the mozzie causing it to explode to smithereens. Yuck...

Eewy facts eh? heehee... p/s, am a zapper and crusher...

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